Whack Ass Coffee - Brewed at a Distance

Updated: Jan 15

The intersection of Lansdowne & Dupont is pretty unremarkable. A grocery store, housing complexes, a dollar store… However, just south of it is something great: Whack Ass Coffee.



Whack Ass opened at the end of Summer 2019. The shop is located at 800 Lansdowne Ave Unit 3; just below street-level. The café is open daily. Hours are as follows*: Monday-Friday 8am-8:30pm, Saturday 9am-8:30pm, and Sunday 9am-8pm.


ATMOSPHERE


Whack Ass Coffee may be unassuming on the outside, but once you enter through its doors, you can’t help but smile at how lively it is. The café is adjourned with white & black checkering, pops of sky blue, and lots of asses (aka donkeys)!



You’ll chuckle as you read the shop’s wall decals and posters; they’re as light-hearted and funny as they are informative (as seen below).



The café is on the smaller side (pre-COVID, the only seating available were a handful of stools), but given its bright colours and eccentricity, you’ll barely notice nor mind. That being said, the coffee shop is best suited for people on the go (especially as there is a TTC bus stop located just outside its doors).


Besides the décor, my favourite thing about Whack Ass is their excellent customer service. From super nice baristas, to kind Instagram posts (including: “We value all of our customers, from the regulars we see everyday, to those who are just passing through. You guys keep it going!”). It’s clear the café cares deeply about their customers.



MENU & PRICE


Whack Ass prides themselves on eco-consciousness, and commits to serving an organic, fair trade, and locally/ethically sourced menu. The café serves Barocco beans and goods from local bakeries (however they plan to serve in-house baked goods soon).


The café sells drip coffee, tea, espresso, americanos, cappuccinos, and lattes (regular, flavoured, or tea). Most drinks are offered hot or on ice. Flavour shots include vanilla, caramel, or mocha. As for milk options, the café offers a variety. You can get your drinks made with 1%, 2%, or 3.35% milk, or a dairy substitute like almond, soy, or oat milk for $0.50.


The coffee is great; I especially enjoy the café’s flavoured lattes (warning: I like my coffee sweet, so you may want to go for regular if you don’t). However, don’t miss out on their selection of iced teas. Although only a few are listed on their menu, Whack Ass typically serves limited time interesting combinations (like green raspberry & mango chia).


Besides their drink menu, Whack Ass serves an impressive selection of baked goods. From biscotti, to cookies, croissants, muffins, and scones, it’ll be hard to resist the pastry display when visiting. The last time I was there, I ordered the chocolate espresso scone. It can be best described as crumbly, chocolatey goodness.


Besides coffee and baked goods, the café is also known for their gelato.



Unfortunately, I visited in the morning and was unable to try their gelato myself. However, the barista at Whack Ass recommended the shop’s affogato – made with any choice of gelato & topped with two shots of warm espresso. It will for sure be my next order (and if I visit in the morning again, I’ll just become an ice cream for breakfast kind of person).


The café is a little on the pricier end, especially for iced drinks. Hot drinks range from $2.25-$5.50, iced drinks from $3.50-$6.25, and gelato from $4.50-$6.50. All the baked goods cost $3 or less.



Coffee is my vice, so I don’t have a problem spending a little more for a quality cup and to support local businesses. However, if it is a little steep for you, consider visiting Monday-Friday between 3pm-5pm for $1 off all iced drinks.


Note: the café is cashless, so don’t forget to bring your debit/credit card when visiting.


HOW TO SUPPORT THEM


The simplest way to support Whack Ass is to patron them. The café has taken precautions to ensure the safety of its customers and staff through implementations like plexiglass, hand sanitizer stations, and disposable masks for anyone who needs them. You can also order from the café for pick-up or delivery on Ritual, Skip the Dishes, and Uber Eats.



Whack Ass closed when the pandemic was first announced and reopened its doors at the end of May. From speaking with one of the baristas, she shared that patronage to the café has since increased due to the increase of passer-byers (yay!).


Although I’m incredibly glad to hear this, the coffee shop is still fairly new and not many people know about it. Most small businesses don’t make it to its first year of operation, and I don’t want that to happen to Whack Ass (or any local coffee shop). So, patronize the café, follow them on Instagram, write them a review on Google, and recommend it to friends.

There’s nothing better than drinking good coffee and supporting local businesses; at Whack Ass, you’ll do both.


SUMMARY


Whack Ass is a new café located steps away from the intersection of Lansdowne & Dupont. They’re open daily, and serve a variety of beverages, baked goods, and gelato. Although small, the café is full of personality including pops of blue, vibrant staff, and pictures of Dudley the Donkey. Whack Ass is very eco-consciousness and serves an organic, fair trade, and locally/ethically sourced menu. Don’t miss out on the café’s flavoured lattes, limited time drinks, or gelato (especially paired with espresso in their affogato). The café is a little on the pricier side, but supporting local is always worth spending an extra dollar or two.



*The Brewed at a Distance series depicts Toronto cafés amidst COVID-19. Hours are subject to change as businesses continue to adapt to the pandemic.

  • Instagram
Buy me a coffee.png

©2020 by Toronto Coffee Date